Festive Boundaries: How to say no to those endless invites.

'Tis the season to be jolly, but what if the mere thought of attending yet another holiday party makes you want to deck the halls with a "No, thank you"? In the past few years I really have become firmer with my boundaries, it has changed my life.

Setting boundaries, especially during the festive season can be difficult. Here's my guide on how to gracefully decline a Christmas party invitation while maintaining your sanity and relationships.

1. Honesty is the Best Policy:
Ok well maybe not TOO honest if you’re going to offend them... Start by being honest with yourself about your feelings and capacity. Acknowledge if you're overwhelmed or simply in need of some downtime. When declining an invitation, a straightforward yet gentle response can be surprisingly effective.

2. Express Gratitude:
Begin your response by expressing gratitude for the invitation. A simple "Thank you so much for thinking of me" sets a positive tone, ensuring the other person knows you appreciate the gesture.

3. Be Clear and Concise:
Clearly communicate your decision without going into unnecessary details. A polite and direct "Unfortunately, I won't be able to make it this time" is sufficient. Avoid over-explaining; it's okay to prioritize your well-being.

4. Offer Alternatives:
If you genuinely want to spend time with the person but can't make it to the party, suggest an alternative plan. It could be as simple as a coffee date or a post-holiday get-together when things are less hectic.

5. Stand Firm:
Once you've made your decision, stand firm. Peer pressure during the holiday season can be intense, but it's crucial to prioritise your mental and emotional well-being. You don't need to apologise for taking care of yourself. Motherhood can be so tiring, If people genuinely care about you they will understand.

6. Communicate Early:
Don't procrastinate in responding to the invitation. Let the host know as soon as possible to give them ample time to adjust plans if needed. Being timely and considerate is key to maintaining positive relationships. This is something I have been working on myself, I always used put off replying to invites as I felt bad and hated saying ‘no’'.

7. Frame it Positively:
Instead of focusing on what you won't be doing, highlight what you will be doing during that time. A positive spin can shift the conversation away from your absence, making it more about your personal plans.

8. Offer a Rain Check:
Assure the host that you value your relationship and would love to catch up at a less hectic time. This reinforces your commitment to the friendship while respecting your current boundaries.

Remember, saying no is an essential skill for maintaining a healthy work-life balance, especially during the holiday season. By setting clear boundaries and communicating openly, you can survive the festive period without feeling overwhelmed and burnt out.