Dilemma: I moved across the country for my friend who then ghosted me!

Advice needed please!

I have had quite the dilemma over the last year and a half. 

My husband and I moved our children (and our whole lives) from one part of the country to another (I can’t give too many details incase anyone involved reads this!) We made this move to be closer to friends who already lived in that part of the country.

Our friends and family from home were devastated when we moved away, the friend we were moving to be closer to sold us a very good story that “we will all be very close, do lots of stuff, see each other all the time, never leave you to fend for yourself in a new area “ etc etc.  The day we moved, I was very upset- I knew we were going to have a great new start but I was so sad to leave everything and everyone behind.

From that day they just left us to it, point blank made no effort. When we were in the removals van driving to the new house, they wouldn’t even answer our calls - nor even pick up the new house key from estate agents for us. They missed all of our birthdays (including the kids), even though we always make the effort for their kids. I didn’t have any other friends here so I would message her and ask to meet at a park, soft play, swimming, baby/toddler groups. I would always get fobbed off or just point blank ignored.

In the end, I started to make my own new life. I went out made new friends, enrolled the kids into new preschools/schools , made new mum friends. I’ve had major surgery, and despite this still no contact from them. Part of me wants to go home to the people that actually miss us and want us around, but the other half wants to show them how amazingly we’ve done in the last year and a half and have made a life for ourselves without help from them. I think it’s now gone too far to even forgive her for the lack of care/help when I really needed it. The issue is we have joint friends/family so I have to be so very careful how I deal with it.

I’ve got through this year remembering that their behaviour says more about them than us. But what would you do?…