Bridging the Gap: Exploring the Gender roles in Household Chores.
In the modern world of evolving gender roles, it's disheartening to witness a persistent gender gap in household chores. Despite changes in society, the majority of the household responsibilities often fall on women. In this blog, I look at household chores and explore the impacts it has on our mental health and also our relationships.
Looking into and asking friends, it’s clear that the division of household chores reveals a significant imbalance, with women often taking on the majority of responsibilities. This inequity raises questions about us still living with traditional gender roles. Women are now often expected to work, but also take on the majority of the responsibility of looking after the children and also the household chores.
Deep-rooted expectations in society and stereotypes result in gender-specific roles in households. Breaking free from these expectations is so important for achieving a more balanced and fair household. The imbalance in household chores can cause so much discontent in relationships, leading to resentment and dissatisfaction and continual arguments over who’s done what, especially when your partner comes from a household with traditional gender roles, it feels so difficult to break the cycle.
I have found the best way to start to change things is by communication and renegotiation of responsibilities. Setting your boundaries and also voicing your expectations of what they need to do in the house becomes essential for maintaining healthy partnerships.
Many of us find ourselves juggling demanding careers alongside the lion's share of household duties. This leaves us exhausted, burnt out and limits us in our careers and social life.
The mental load’ is also another thing that out partners (and society) often overlook. Beyond visible tasks, the emotional and mental burden of organising, planning, and managing household affairs often falls disproportionately on the Mum.
So what do we need to do to begin to see a change?
Strategies for Bridging the Gap:
Open Communication: The foundation of change begins with open and honest communication between partners. Discuss expectations, concerns, and the division of labour openly to create a shared understanding.
Reevaluating Roles: Challenge traditional gender roles by reevaluating and renegotiating responsibilities based on individual strengths, preferences, and availability. Recognise that there is no one-size-fits-all approach.
Joint Planning: Create a joint plan for household chores that considers both partners' schedules and commitments. Creating a joint approach gives a sense of shared responsibility and fairness.
Setting Realistic Expectations: Acknowledge that perfection in household chores is an unattainable standard. Set realistic expectations and embrace imperfections, understanding that everyone contributes in their unique way. The house can’t always be perfect and its unfair if one parent expects it to be.
Embracing Flexibility: Life is unpredictable, and flexibility is key. Be adaptable to changing circumstances and avoid rigid expectations, allowing both partners to contribute as their schedules allow.
Delegating and Outsourcing: Consider delegating specific tasks or outsourcing certain responsibilities to lighten the load. This could include (if you are financially able to) hiring cleaning services or involving other family members in shared responsibilities.
Education and Awareness: Promote education and awareness about the gender gap in household chores. Show your children that the household jobs aren’t just for one gender and hopefully break the cycle for them. Encourage conversations at the community level, in educational institutions, and within families to challenge and reshape societal expectations.
Modelling Equality: Lead by example in your social circles. Modelling an equitable distribution of household chores demonstrates that shared responsibilities are not only achievable but also beneficial for individual well-being and relationship satisfaction.
Supportive Workplaces: Advocate for workplace policies that support work-life balance for all genders. Creating environments that acknowledge and accommodate family responsibilities contributes to a more equitable division of chores.
Seeking Professional Support: In cases where challenges persist, consider seeking the guidance of a relationship counsellor or therapist. Professional support can provide tools and strategies for navigating complex dynamics.
By acknowledging, discussing, and challenging traditional norms, we can work towards a more balanced and equitable distribution of domestic responsibilities. Bridging the gender gap in household chores is not just a matter of fairness; it's a crucial step toward having healthier relationships and dismantling outdated societal expectations.
For more insights into gender dynamics and equality, consider exploring reputable sources such as Lean In and UN Women.
